Warning: Emotional Post

Wow. You think you're ok. You think everything is fine. You think you've gotten over all of the pains of it, and then you remember something small. That small thing could be the stupidest thing ever, but it's something you had with one person. No one else will ever have that moment with you. No one else will ever have that moment with them. I can't forget being in love with you. You can't forget being in love with me. It's silly isn't it? You never forget your first love they say, but how can you forget anyone you loved? How can you forget someone who knows how you feel even when you can't express it in words? How can I forget someone who risked everything, and I do mean everything, multiple times just to be with me? New relationships will happen. New everything. There's a song called the "Circle Game." I remember being in high school standing in a circle with some of my closest friends at the end of every conclave. I hadn't slept in three days. And I had just spent a weekend with people who were my friends immediately, there was no social drama, just people being honest and amazing. And we would sing songs that would always make my cry. Not just because I was tired, but because they made me realize, that I cannot return to the past. I can never have what I used to have. I can think about it, but I can't return to it. Our lives are crazy. Life is emotional. Life is a series of moments. Life is confusing. Life is irrational. We spend our lives looking for answers. But, what are the answers we are looking for? Are they even the important things? I don't even know what I am writing anymore. Which is usually a good cue to stop writing. My head is pounding. I think a nap is more than in order.

P.S. You are still on my list of people I would die for.

Nick at Nite ^.^

50% Orange Juice
25% Island Blue Pucker
25% Peach Shnapps

That's Sarah Lawrence for ya.

"So tonight at Bates I found an oak leaf in my collard greens."

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Difficult, but necessary...I think.

Aw.

This is why I like Mike so much.

"I have this friend. She is really awesome. Some might tell you she is a bad person but you can ignore that. Being an instant judge of character, I can tell you she is the bomb fucking diggity. I'm glad that I know her and very greatful for her friendship.

Sara,

You rock.

Love,

Mike"

Dario I love you like whoa.

"Ripsy. A verbal velociraptor with a baby sabretooth tiger style. You can't stop her. You can't even hope to contain her."

This should be on a shirt. I'd wear it all the time.

WHAT?

I might get a "new" car to bring up to school. By "new" I mean my mom's old car. Mmm leather seats.

Pull the ripchord, the ship has lost its sail.

There is a kid I know from high school who is currently in jailing for selling oxycontin to a kid who OD'd on it. Wow, it's weird to think that I sat in classes with him. I never took him to be the kind of guy who would intentionally hurt someone. He just seemed like your average pot head teenager. If he is convicted then he has the possibility of spending twenty years in jail. He's 19. 39 when he would be released. Wow. It makes me cry to think about, in all honesty. We weren't friends or anything of the sort, but this is a kid who made a dumb mistake and will possibly pay for it for 20 years. There are people who say he made his bed and now he has to lie in it. But, twenty years is a long time. Yes, the other kid is dead, but should two lives be destroyed? Weird. Life takes us so many different places. He is going to have to grow up quickly. This is too weird.