Uh, Lord, hallowed be Thy name. May our feet be swift; may our bats be mighty; may our balls... be plentiful.

So there's this girl named L12. She thinks that she's going to sucker me into giving her a blue iPod mini. Well, here's a little secret. She can go fuck herself. I fixed the iPod. It's mine. Is it my fault that I am a computer genius? No. If you make anti-semetic jokes, you have basically guaranteed yourself that you're not getting an iPod.. I'm just saying.

However, I'll make someone a deal, even the anti-semetic one. If I buy a new iPod over the summer you can have my old one for $150. That's as low as I'll go.

But, call me a Jew again and see if I don't slash your tires.

I will not only escort you, I will walk you there.

I just watched three episodes of That's So Raven. This show is begging me to make fun of it. I just don't have words. It makes me want to gouge my eyes out with soldering irons. Good thing Nate has those maybe he'll let me borrow them.

Good news! Robert is on his way home!

I do believe Marsellus Wallace, my husband, your boss, told you to take ME out and do WHATEVER I WANTED. Now I wanna dance, I wanna win. I want that t

I've got a funny story for you.

My beloved grandmother is an interesting woman, and my six year old cousin and her best friend came to Omaha to visit. One night these two girls were escaping from their mothers and the evilness that is the bathtub. So, my grandmother thought it would be funny to take pictures of these two naked six year old girls... haha, no harm no foul, right? Wrong! My grandmother's asst. dropped off her pictures at the local Bag N' Save. The photo girl developed the photos and saw pictures of naked girls on a bed. This girl, being a fine upstanding American, made a decisive action to call the police and alert them to this. At 8:00 am police officers came to my grandmother's apt building to speak with her. Being an 80 year old woman, she takes her time getting ready. The police leave and give the doorman their card. She then has her asst. come up to her building. The police return, and it turns out it's not the police, but a detective and a woman from children's serivces. After they interrogate her they realize that she is not a child pornographer, but a delightful old woman. Yeah, so the moral of the story is don't take pictures of naked children.

A pokey little puppy...

My sister is amazing. So, her iPod mini stopped working and I told her to let me look at it. But, since I am obviously a computer retard, she didn't believe I could fix it... so instead she went to my mom who bought her a new one! However, I fixed her iPod, and since I am cool my mom let me keep it. So, now I have two iPods.

Yay

O'Doyle, I've got a feeling your whole family's going down.

So, Jen has informed me that my journal is boring. Well fuck you.

I applied for a job with Red Bull two days ago. It was the weirdest job interview... ever. Instead of them asking me questions about myself, I played acting games with other kids. There were six people at the interview. Two of the people were from Lincoln and four were from Omaha. Out of all the Omaha kids, (two were girls, one was a boy, and me) I was the most energetic I think. I made sure to be really outgoing and I think that they liked me. The job allegedly pays like $250/week. Tomorrow I am applying for a telemarketing job. So, I could be getting paid $12/hour. Which would be hella tight. Yep. That's all really.

He's gayer than Doris Day

from Detroit Free Press: A conservative Christian group launched a boycott against Ford Motor Co., saying the second-largest U.S. automaker has given thousands of dollars to gay rights groups, offers benefits to same-sex couples and actively recruits gay employees.

"From redefining family to include homosexual marriage, to giving hundreds of thousands of dollars to support homosexual groups and their agenda, to forcing managers to attend diversity training on how to promote the acceptance of homosexuality... Ford leads the way," American Family Association chairman Donald Wildmon said in a statement.

Tupelo, Miss.-based AFA said it e-mailed an announcement about the Ford boycott to 2.2 million supporters. AFA special projects director Randy Sharp said nearly 55,000 people had signed a pledge supporting the boycott by Tuesday afternoon.

Sharp is upset by Ford's marketing tactics in gay-oriented publications, including offering to donate $1,000 to the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation for every Jaguar or Land Rover sold.

Women are pussies.

Top 10 cars for men

1. Porsche 911 coupe, $70,095 - $193,765

2. Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution, $28,504 - $35,274

3. Ford GT, $143,345

4. Volkswagen Phaeton, $68,905 - $104,455

5. BMW 6-series convertible, $76,900

6. Jaguar XK8 coupe, $69,830

7. Maserati Spyder, $92,302 - $96,465

8. Mercedes CL, $96,720 - $132,320

9. BMW 6-series coupe, $69,900

10. Porsche 911 convertible, $79,895 - $141,995

Top 10 cars for women

1. Pontiac G6 convertible, (Not yet available)

2. Suzuki Forenza, $13,994 - $18,494

3. Volkswagen New Beetle convertible, $22,940 - $27,100

4. Volkswagen New Beetle, $17,185 - $27,100

6. Pontiac Sunfire coupe, $11,460 - $15,770

7. Volvo XC70, $36,080

8. Mitsubishi Eclipse convertible, $25,744 - $31,544

9. Chrysler PT Cruiser convertible, $20,045 - $29,120

10. Kia Rio sedan, $10,535 - $13,065

Put down that pretzel so we can talk...

Apple has lost its mind. It has decided to switch processors and make a move to Intel. I have heard mixed things. Rob doesn't see this being a positive. But, the cult of mac blog puts forth an interesting point of view.

"Apple -- or rather, Hollywood -- wants the Pentium D to secure an online movie store (iFlicks if you will), that will allow consumers to buy or rent new movies on demand, over the Internet.

According to News.com, the Intel transition will occur first in the summer with the Mac mini, which I'll bet will become a mini-Tivo-cum-home-server.

Hooked to the Internet, it will allow movies to be ordered and stored, and if this News.com piece is correct, loaded onto the video iPod that's in the works.

Intel's DRM scheme has been kept under wraps -- to prevent giving clues to crackers -- but the company has said it will allow content to be moved around a home network, and onto suitably-equipped portable devices.

And that's why the whole Mac platform has to shift to Intel. Consumers will want to move content from one device to another -- or one computer to another -- and Intel's DRM scheme will keep it all nicely locked down.

Presumably, Jobs used his Pixar moxie to persuade Hollywood to get onboard, and they did so because the Mac platform is seen as small and isolated -- just as it was when the record labels first licensed music to iTunes. The new Mac/Intel platform will be a relatively isolated test bed for the digital distribution of movies and video. "


I don't know. It will be interesting to see what changes occur because of this. I don't think they'll necessarily lose the diehards, but they'll be taking them kicking and screaming.

The last few days have been without a doubt amazing. I am in love. I've forgotten how much fun it is to be in love. She's really amazing. I am too tired to really reflect, but I'll tell tomorrow.

Water Water Everywhere, But Not A Drop to Drink

"No matter what your sexual preference, true love is always the ultimate fantasy."

So, I have been terrible about updating this journal since I have been home. This morning I woke up and showered, I knew Mariah was going to call me to hang out so I didn't really plan on do anything until she called. At about 11:30 I was still in my towel and getting antsy. She called me to tell me that her grandma was gone for the afternoon and that she'd like me to come over and keep her company. I go over there and I hate being at or around her house. It makes me very very uneasy. You have to analyze a situation and I have no safe exits or escapes at her house. So, we hang out there for a while and after about an hour long shower we head out to get lunch. We go to Feta's at 114 & Dodge. Then Ashley calls and asks if we want to go to Courtney's graduation party. We agree and, she tells us to come over in 40 minutes. By this point I had hit the naptime part of the day. I started to get irritable, which Mariah could tell and so I was pretty unhappy with the fact that we missed everyone at Courtney's party because we had to wait so long for Ashley. After the party, it was decided to go shopping, so we went to Crossroads. It really wasn't as fun as I wanted it to be, but...

Wow. Late nights are amazing.

"If someone was chasing me down and that shit happened to them I would totally go back and help them." -Sara
"I wouldn't, I'd go back and stomp on their neck." - Mike

"We couldn't have jump ropes in our house because..." Mike
"...because you're Mexican and Mexicans just can't jump rope, it's a fact of life..." - Nate
"no... because I once tied up my sister with a rope with so many knots in it that my mom had to cut her out..." - Mike

"Horniness can last as long as you want it to, but orgasms only come when you don't want them.... too... that came out bad."-Anne

Omaha shenanigans.

"I've never been in love."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"What the hell are you talking about? You're glowing right now... ok that's the black light... but still."